Do you ever feel like you have no one to talk to? Like no one could possibly understand what you are going through or how you are feeling? That’s where I’ve been this week.
There are things going on that I simply can’t discuss on the internet. Not because I don’t want to be candid, trust me I do, but because it really isn’t my information to share. Yet the feelings it leaves me with are very real.
Have you ever been there?
Have you ever wanted more than anything to talk to someone who could understand where you are at, yet not known who that was?
My heart is breaking, yet I feel alone.
And this isn’t the first time I have felt this way either…
Have you ever felt like there was no one you could talk to who could possibly understand what you were going through? Heather has… Click To TweetLife Happens (& it’s hard)
In 2002, my (now) ex-husband left me for another woman. I moved back into my mom’s house with our baby boy, and tried to move on with my life but it was one of the emotionally turbulent experiences I had ever been through. And I was only 18.
I had graduated high school a year early and decided to wait to get my degree. My friends were all either still in high school, or enjoying their first year of college. Either way, none of them understood what I was going through. And even though I had grown up in the church, I was still pretty new to having an actual relationship with Jesus.
So I felt alone.
During the day you never would have guessed how much I was hurting. I was bitter, and that showed, but I saved my tears until everyone else had gone to bed.
No one my age could possibly understand, and anyone older than me wrote me off as just a kid, even though what I was going through wasn’t “kid” stuff.
Every night I cried out to Jesus for someone to talk to. I wanted Jesus to be enough, but I also wanted someone who was flesh and blood who could hug me and tell me everything was going to be okay.
I wanted a Christian friend who could understand what I was going through.
Emotionally Alone
Fast-forward to today and I find myself in the exact same place, but for different reasons.
I am surrounded by people who love me. My husband and children. Our church family. An amazing small-town community. Yet even with all of these people who are flesh and blood, I still feel emotionally alone. I feel emotionally alone, even though I have prayed and poured my heart out to Jesus (because that’s the only way I can sleep at night).
If you have ever been where I am, can I tell you something?
We are not alone, but Satan would love for us to believe that we are.
I know God wants to use this time to grow my faith. But I also know that’s hard and I won’t make it through this trial unscathed without Jesus.
While I am walking through this emotional wilderness, I know that while I feel alone, I am anything but.
Know What You Know
When Jesus was in the wilderness facing all of Satan’s trials, He knew He wasn’t alone.
“And the tempter came and said to him, ‘If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread.'” (Matthew 4:3)
Ladies, Jesus knew He was the Son of God. That was never a question in His mind, and I think that’s part of the reason He was able to endure.
Satan wants us to believe his lies. He wants us to question not only who we are, but Who is with us.
Satan wants us to believe that we are alone.
The first time I went through a wilderness, I fell for it hook, line, and sinker. And my faith suffered. I spent several years afterwards seeking worldly connection. I wanted emotional support and Satan used that to slowly and subtly draw me away from Jesus.
But Jesus never let me go. He drew me back to Him, and I am not going to fall for that again.
I'm not falling for that again… #GiveMeJesus Click To TweetI know that I am a child of God. I know I am not alone. And I know God cares about what I am going through.
I may not know how this situation will end, but I know Jesus will never leave me.
I Am Not Alone
While Satan would love for us to believe that we are alone, we can know we aren’t.
“Way back when” I knew Jesus was with me, but that wasn’t enough for me because Satan tricked me into believing Jesus wasn’t real enough.
But Jesus is real.
Instead of focusing on what has me emotionally broken, I need to shift my focus to the One who heals me. The One who hears me. The One who holds all things in His hands.
Because I know that Jesus is with me and He is for me.
Romans 8:31 says, “If God is for us, who can be against us?”
And more than that, if God gave up His own Son for us, “how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” (vs 32)
We can count on Jesus, no matter what we are going through, and no matter what’s coming.
Take that Satan.
What About You?
Have you ever felt emotionally alone? Like no one could understand what you were going through, or like Jesus wasn’t enough? Share your thoughts, experiences, or encouragement with us in the comments below.
*Originally posted March 29th, 2018
Christian Books for Related Reading
(Reminder: We use Amazon affiliate links)
You can also check out my post on Kingdom Bloggers: Finding Joy In The Trials Of Life
Heather, my heart and prayers go out to you, and I’ve touched on my own story (similar to yours)—that happened years ago—in my new, short inspirational book that I’ll be releasing soon, titled, “Hurting Hearts Need a Light.” It’s a quick read that offers hope and encouragement to hurting hearts. I believe many have walked in your shoes. You are not alone. There is always hope for better days although knowing this sometimes brings little relief when we’re in the midst of our pain. I pray He will lift you up and set your feet on higher ground.
Thanks, Debbie.
This is a place I feel often. As a therapist I sit with person after person and all of their pain. None of their stories are mine to tell. I can speak in vague themes but those closest to me can’t understand the emotions I can carry for my clients and the pain that exists in their life. Yet Jesus understands and knows the stories of every single one of us. He knows all of our pain and took on our sin.
Amen! I am so thankful we have a God who not only knows what we all go through, but also how it will end.
I understand this! Satan likes to capitalize on these feelings and they can bring us down into a deep pit. I do feel better when I can bear my soul to God and my husband!
Yes! Satan will use any weak spot he can find to bring us down.
I’m here for you – praying…
Thanks, Phyllis.
I’ve been spending more time than normal in this place this past month. It feels so desperate and alone and it’s so wonderful to know that we are never alone. Even in our weakest and most lonely moments, we have lots of strength and company with our sisters in Christ. Thank you for sharing, Heather.
Praying for you today, Valerie
Heather I am not sure how I found this article but am glad I did. I am in this emotional wilderness more than I’d like to be, and sometimes am not sure if I’d feel better uttering words of truth or just hurling globs of paint at the wall. One day I am strong in faith, the next I wonder. And in it all I am trying to trust that Jesus is larger than my dented faith. Whew!
I can so relate to that, Meghan! I love that Jesus’ love for us isn’t dependent on unwavering faith in Him. It isn’t always easy, but I love knowing He is always with me.
Yes, I often feel emotionally alone. Spending days on end with children and little to no adult conversation leads to that. There are so many blessings in this life of SAHM, but that is one area I struggle with. Thank you for the encouragement!
I totally get that, Tiffany! I went through that season of life and remember what is was like. I felt very isolated and alone, especially when my husband worked long hours. Praying for you today.