In my last two posts, I’ve discussed the first two words in the acronym Y.E.S., which stands for Yield, Elevate, and Supplicate. This acronym represents three steps to becoming the wives God has called us to be. If you’d like to read all three posts from the beginning, you can start here with the first one.
The “S” in Y.E.S. stands for Supplication. Supplication is just a fancy word for speaking to God on your husband’s behalf. Some call it intercession, “standing in the gap,” or just plain old prayer. It doesn’t matter what you call it, as long as you’re doing it!
I don’t think it’s an accident that it is the last word in the acronym. Prayer is the anchor that tethers us to God, and the two-way lifeline by which we both plead for our husbands, and receive God’s Spirit-leading in our role as wife. Today, I want to share a few truths that God has been teaching me about praying for my own husband, in hopes that you will find it helpful in your own marriage.
[ctt template=”2″ link=”XbK0M” via=”no” ]Prayer is the anchor that tethers us to God–a two-way lifeline we use to plead for our husbands & God to lead us as wives[/ctt]
5 Important Truths About Praying for Your Husband
1.) When you commit to praying for your husband, you may immediately face spiritual attacks.
So picture this: you commit to pray for your husband. You take some time and lay it all out before the Lord, praying your heart out for your wonderful man. You come away from your time of supplication feeling energized, refreshed, and renewed. Praise the Lord! But wait. Not sixty seconds later, your husband comes barging into the room, furious because you squeezed the toothpaste from the middle… again. Anger wells up inside of you because not only is he being rude, but he’s being rude to the woman who just gave up twenty minutes of her time praying… for him!
Okay, so I was being funny about the toothpaste. But do you know what I’m talking about? Satan is out to destroy your marriage. The attacks you face may be as silly as the toothpaste, or they may be much, much more serious. Expect the attacks, and brace yourself for pushing through. Because you know what? Satan doesn’t call the shots; our Father is bigger than him.
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” ~ James 4:7 (NIV)
When the hard times come – and they will – press on, and press into God. Resist the devil with scripture and prayer, and he will flee.
2.) The times when you can’t stand the thought of praying for him are times he needs your prayers the most.
I have to admit that there are times when I don’t want to pray for my husband. Simply put, I don’t want him to receive God’s blessings because I’m so mad. It’s awful, but it’s true. But what I’m learning is that those are times when my husband desperately needs my prayers. They are probably the times when he is struggling the most, and in need of someone to lift him up to the Lord because he is too weak to do it himself.
“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” ~ Matthew 5:44 (NIV)
Our husbands aren’t ever the enemy – the Enemy, Satan, is the real enemy. But sometimes we feel persecuted and deeply wounded by our husbands, don’t we? If we are to love our enemies and pray for our persecutors, how much more should we pray for the life partners God has called us to support, love and protect? When you feel like you can’t pray for him, just speak out the words, or pray the fruit of the Spirit, or 1 Corinthians 13, replacing his name wherever you see the word “love.” Anything you pray is going to begin to soften your heart toward him, allowing you to engage in the spiritual battle raging for your husband’s heart.
3.) The times when it seems like things are going great are times he needs your prayers the most.
This isn’t a typo! The times your husband is being mean-spirited and difficult are times he needs prayer the most. But the times when everything seems to be going well might be times when he needs your prayers even more:
“Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” ~ 1 Peter 5:8 (NIV)
What better target for a roaming devil than a husband who is attentive to his wife, a great spiritual leader, kindhearted and seeking to serve the Lord? We can’t forget to engage in battle for our husbands during the times when life is “good;” we must be alert and of sober mind!
4.) Prayer is so much more effective than complaining… but complaining is so much easier!
You may not be someone who verbally complains much about your husband, but we all think unkind thoughts from time to time, and Jesus put just as much value on our heart condition as on our actions. I have recently come to the conclusion that if I prayed for my husband as much as I complain about him in my mind, both of our lives would be so much better! Imagine how God would work in our marriage?
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” ~ James 5:16 (NIV)
I needed to confess to the Lord and to a prayer partner my grumbling attitude toward my husband, and ask for her prayers. If you don’t have a prayer partner to support you in this journey of supporting your husband through prayer, stop right now and get one! Okay…got one? Now you have someone to confess your sins to and pray with, to better equip you for the task of praying for your husband. Prayer is so much harder than complaining, but complaining isn’t effective for doing anything but damage. Your prayers on your husband’s behalf are guaranteed to be “powerful and effective”.
5.) Praying for your husband might just change you more than it changes him.
Our goal for praying for our husbands may be to see a positive change in them, but another lesson I’m learning is that praying for my husband is beginning to change me, and exposing areas of our marriage where I have room to grow.
“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” ~ Hebrews 4:12 (NIV)
Whether you are actively praying scripture, or simply communing with the Living Word, you are opening yourself up to transformation.
Will you say Y.E.S. to God in your own marriage today?
Will you Yield, Elevate, and Supplicate so that God would be glorified more brilliantly in and through your marriage? I hope you will, and would love to hear your prayer requests and success stories in the comments so that we can be encouraging and supporting one another in our calling as wives.
“For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ. And so through him the “Amen” is spoken by us to the glory of God.” – 2 Corinthians 1:20 (NIV)
[ctt template=”2″ link=”05cbe” via=”no” ]Will you say Y.E.S. to God in your marriage today?[/ctt]
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Ouch! This really spoke to me because I don’t often criticize my husband audibly but I think harsh thoughts towards him way too often. I’m going to go back and read the other two posts in this series. Thanks for sharing!
Edie, as I read through this post today, I felt convicted too! So funny how head knowledge is one thing, but to apply it means laying ourselves down on the altar daily. But I know we can do it 🙂
Such a powerful post! I’ve been writing prayers for my husband in the morning and it has been amazing to feel the difference in my perspective and just the power of prayer. I love the acronym and now I want to read the first two I missed. Have a blessed day.
Wow, Valerie- what a great idea! Do you ever plan on showing him the prayers? That sounds like it could make a really neat gift sometime, a book of prayers you’ve been praying for him. Thank you so much for sharing!
These are great, Jaime! Prayer is such an important part of marriage. And I think you are so right that it often changes us.
Thanks so much, Heather!
Have I ever thought to pray as much for him as I complain about him… ouch… but you betcha I will think twice now!! Thanks for some really practical tips! Pinning this for sure ♥
Thanks so much, Heather!
These are great! The one that really stuck with me was that prayer is more important than complaining, but complaining is so much easier. This is so true!!!!
I know, Cynthia – it’s so easy to default to the easy path. I do it all the time! I’m praying that we will all be blessed as we commit to trying to take the road less traveled 🙂
YES I agree. He is part of us, so why wouldnt we pray for him daily
Amen, Terri!
Wives and husbands should be praying for each other and for their marriage!
I agree, Andrea. Prayer is SO powerful!!
Such good advice. Honestly, it only gets harder the longer you have been married. So starting out when you are young would be a great idea. Then those hurts and frustrations wouldn’t accumulate. Great post. Thanks for sharing.
Amy, I’m finding that too. Somehow I thought that things got easier the longer you went along, but I think for me adding kids into the mix was a factor in ignoring the importance of strengthening our marriage and prioritizing prayer. After almost 18 years of marriage, I am more dependent than ever on God’s grace!!
“Prayer is the anchor that tethers us to God.” I love it! We definitely need to be praying for our husbands every day!
Absolutely, Susan!
Sometimes if we don’t pray for our husbands, no one else will. It’s a privilege!
Tara, what a sobering thought! I had never looked at it like that before. If our husbands are the closest person to us, they are our number one responsibility when it comes to prayer covering. So so true!
Thank you for these reminders today for praying for our husbands. The one that really sticks out is praying for him when things are good – I think often times we think we aren’t open for attack then but this clearly isn’t true. Love these truths about prayer today dear sister!
Lindsey, I’m with you! Not just in my marriage but in every aspect of life. My prayer is that God will bring our husbands to mind even in those times of abundance. Thank you for stopping by!