Do You Ever Feel Like You Don’t Belong is a guest post written by Billie Breeden
Experts call it imposter syndrome.
The feeling of not being enough.
If you find yourself doubting your abilities and feeling like a fraud, feeling like if people knew everything about you, they wouldn’t admire or appreciate you the way they do, you are not alone.
At one point or another in our lives, we have all had to deal with this.
Sometimes the feelings come from hurtful things that have been said to us or things that we constantly have on repeat, things like “you are not good enough”, “you aren’t good at this or that”, “there are better options around”, “you are too old/young” etc
Growing up, I watched my dad do everything he could to provide for me and my four siblings. We lived in a small house. We didn’t have the things other children our age had. Our clothes were hand me downs and we were reminded often by our parents that money was hard to come by and there was never enough to go around.
When I was in 2nd Grade, I needed to do some coloring, but I did not have enough crayons. I had a box of eight crayons, but a girl by my side had a box containing 68 crayons. I asked to borrow some of her crayons, but she did not give me any. She said, “No, you can’t borrow one, because you can’t color as good as I can. I will color it for you”.
As silly as it may sound, this stuck with me for most of my life. I did not have what other children had. I did not know how to color. I was not good enough.
We didn’t fit in, and it affected the way I saw myself. This continued even when I started my career as a nurse and became a Director of Nursing, I still felt I wasn’t good enough and unworthy of all I had accomplished. I had to force myself to hold conversations with people. I felt I was not deserving of any good thing life had to offer.
I believe a lot of people can relate to this experience.
When I accepted Christ in 1976, I knew that I was his, but honestly, I really did not know who I was, what God had given me other than salvation, I definitely did not know that as a daughter of God I had authority to advance his kingdom and do everything he had purposed me to do. I struggled with self-doubt and honestly did not understand my true value or my identity in Christ. I knew I was saved but did not fully understand what Christ had for me or who I was in him.
When I retired from nursing after 40 plus years, I realized that I had based all my identity on my career. I wasn’t sure who I was and what I was supposed to do with myself.
My transformation came when I finally understood that God was not waiting for me to be good enough. He determined that when he “chose me in Him before the creation of the world that I should be holy and without fault in His eyes.” (Ephesians 1:4 NLT)
I realized that the next phase of my life was not in God’s hands, but mine. In me becoming convinced of who He says I am and taking hold of what is already mine. All I needed was a mindset shift.
Stepping into who God says you are is life changing.
3 Reminders For When You Don’t Feel Like You Belong
Who does God say you are? Here are 3 of my favorite reminders.
You are Created in the Image of God
Your very nature is God’s nature.
Man was created in the likeness of God.Genesis 1:27
Why would you ever think you are not good enough?
Who you are in Him far outweighs what you do and what others say about you.
You are Loved and Accepted by God
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.Romans 5:8 (NIV)
The best part of this is we don’t have to perform before we can gain the love of God. We didn’t even have to love Him before He loved us.
You Are a Reflection of His Glory
We behold his glory with unveiled faces as in a mirror.2 Corinthians. 3:18
When you look into a mirror what do you see?
Again, when you look into a mirror what do you see? What we should see, is not just our face, but his glory.
We look into his glory and see who we are, not just who he is. You are the righteousness of God in Christ and when you look at yourself, you should see Him, His glory. You are a reflection of His glory.
This Changes Everything
When I realized that I am a reflection of Him, it changed everything, It changed the way I saw myself in the mirror. I used to see my imperfections, now when I see myself, I see a beautiful woman, filled with the grace and glory of God. It is a life changer!
It might sound too good to be true, but you are enough!
It is time to leave behind all the old thoughts about yourself, yours and others’ opinions about who you are and what you are capable of, and step into the internal reality of who God says you are.
So, the next time you feel like you do not belong, the next time you feel left out, or someone says something negative about you, before you buy into those lies, ask yourself this question: “Who does God say I am?”
It is time to leave behind all the old thoughts about yourself, yours and others’ opinions about who you are and what you are capable of, and step into the reality of who God says you are.
Because honestly, ladies, breakthrough is on the other side of your thinking.
Share this post to encourage someone today.
About the Author
Billie is a Certified Christian Life Coach, a Registered Nurse, a wife, a mother, grandmother, and an author of a book called Grace Freely Given. Billie’s mission is to enable women of faith to fully understand that they are a reflection of God’s glory, and understand how valuable they are to Him, and that they CAN impact their piece of the world. Get her FREE Life Purpose Assessment that will help you determine how aligned you are with your life’s purpose.